The battle of the grocery delivery apps is upon us

The pingdemic ushered in a wave of milk ’n’ crisps ’n’ booze couriers to make our lives even more frictionless. But of the five leading start-ups, which one rules? THE FACE finds out.

They crept up on us over lockdown. A poster on a bus stop, a flyer through the door. Then suddenly, they were everywhere: grocery delivery apps. Following Deliveroo, Uber Eats and, er, JustEat, this is the next wave of start-ups battling to make our go-go-go lives even more frictionless than they already were.

The idea is simple. Instead of popping to the shop, you order groceries on a super-seamless app, to be packed at a local dark-store and zipped over by a friendly delivery person, all within mere minutes. In the past 12 months, several have launched in the UK. Companies like Getir, Weezy, Gorillas, Zapp and Dija each come with their own hyper-millennial branding (random names, bright colours, sans serif logos, you geddit) and user experiences so smooth you’d have no trouble placing an order whilst half asleep or blind drunk – trust us.

As loyal corner-shop goers, we were sceptical. Until the recent pingdemic hit, and like many in self-isolation, we were left unable to leave the house for snacks. Suddenly, these apps were all we had.

Whether it’s worth it, or a bit of a fad, there was no option left but to rate and review the five apps that have been advertising to us most aggressively. The very scientific hypothesis? The speediest, cheapest and catchiest-named takes the crown.

  • WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY  WEEZY 

Let’s start with the pink one, Weezy, which works with local suppliers to offer 2000+ curated products” and sustainably delivered” using electric bikes.

It’s free delivery on orders over £30, which isn’t hard when a single aubergine costs £1.25. No, really. You do get 50 per cent off if your mate refers you, though.

I placed an order and soon got a call from the person packing it to tell me they’d run out of chocolate ice cream. Sad news, but good service. The real tragedy was that my order took two hours to arrive. They were lovely about it, but perhaps Weezy isn’t one for emergencies.

Cost
Expensive, but sweet deals. 7/​10

Speed
Unpredictable. 2/​10

Name
Not the speediest sounding name really, is it? 4/​10

  • GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS  GORILLAS 

I had no idea where my Weezy was and there wasn’t long til Love Island started, so I needed a Plan B. The Gorillas app promises me it can deliver in under 10 minutes, so I was sold.

Berlin-based Gorillas now deliver across the UK. The app is fun (note the Gorillas Fave” tab featuring nothing but bananas), and lists a huge range of stuff. I order some snacks, watch a little electric bike emoji travel across the map to my house and, unbelievably, seven minutes later they arrive at the door. Magic.

Cost
It’s a bit of a faff to get the £10-off referral deal (a friend has to place an order before your code is activated), but their promise of retail prices” is pretty fair. 7/​10

Speed
Impressive. 9/​10

Name
6/​10 for the banana joke.

  • GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR  GETIR 

With the best App Store reviews of the bunch, 4.8 stars across 18k ratings, I was intrigued.

Getirs range is most similar to a traditional supermarket, i.e. big and basic. I got excited about the “£10 off when you spend £15”, only to discover the offer doesn’t include booze or tobacco. Luckily for them, their delivery person was very charming. Experience redeemed.

Cost
Fair prices, sad deals. 5/​10.

Name
From the Turkish to get” or bring”. Say it out loud though, go on. It’s a nice surprise. It sounds like you’re telling your shopping to GET ERE!!!”. 7/​10 for keeping us on our toes.

Speed
10 minutes, can’t complain. 8/​10

  • ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP  ZAPP 

Bit blown away by Zapp, to be honest. I ordered a bottle of Cava and some gin using the £10-off welcome code, which arrived almost instantly. Not only was there a free bag of sweets inside, there was also a little letter outlining their commitments to reducing food waste, providing ethical working conditions and using electric vehicles.

Zapp’s range is also a winner. They sell both posh crisps and Walkers, and have the best selection of miscellaneous bits (umbrellas, balloons, bottle openers) too.

Cost
One of the cheaper ones. It’s £10 off your first order and £1.99 delivery, free for orders of over £30. 7/​10

Speed
Really bloody speedy. 10/​10

Name
Some would say boring, but I reckon it might be genius: Zapp is primed and ready to be turned into a verb à la Google. Ooh, shall we get some beers Zapped over?” Just sounds right, dunnit? 9/​10

  • DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA  DIJA 

Dijas food range is very Waitrose vibes, but it’s got one of the best, and cheapest, drinks ranges of the apps.

As you’d expect from Deliveroo alumni, the whole Dija experience is an incredibly smooth ride. It was almost… too uneventful? But that might be the self-isolation getting to me.

Cost
A lovely 50 per cent off your first order with no minimum spend. 7/​10

Name
Nice, but forgettable. 5/​10

Speed
13 minutes it said, 13 minutes it was. 7/​10

So there we have it. Pick your fighters, and make sure you rinse those welcome offers for all they’re worth. I reckon we’ll be putty in the delivery apps hands quicker than you can say I’ll never do a big shop again”.

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