Image from @markcannatarofilms on Instagram

A definitive list of every take on the Will Smith slap

Chris Rock could have died! It was Will's Illuminati initiation! The whole thing was staged! Let's just all take a breather, shall we?

In a world full of constant overexposure to, well, just about everything, it can feel like you have to have an opinion on all the things. When the latest scandal happens, whether it’s a serious socio-political issue or something more lighthearted, we’re inundated with hot takes squeezed into a 280 word tweet, or endless lines of text on an Instagram story too small to read without squinting.

What’s the whole world reacting to this time? The moment when Will Smith slapped Chris Rock at Sunday’s Oscars ceremony, after the stand-up comedian made a joke about Jada Pinkett Smith’s alopecia. Jada, I love you. G.I. Jane 2, can’t wait to see it,” Rock said, in reference to her shaved head. It was swiftly followed by that now infamous slap, gasps around the room (sorry, globe) and Smith booming, Keep my wife’s name out of your fucking mouth!”

Online, one slap suddenly became symbolic of all the issues currently happening in the world. Toxic masculinity, Black on Black crime, and even, somehow, a metaphor for Russia’s invasion of Ukraine. Not forgetting those it could have killed him!!!!” takes.

If you haven’t heard or seen any of these takes, it’s all good. We’ve compiled a definitive list of every take on the Will Smith slap:

  • That Jada has always” been bald so jokes about her are fine and she should just buy a wig

  • That Will discredited his award for male lead by resorting to violence

  • That Will’s apology was offensive to victims of spiritual abuse

  • The slap being compared to Russia invading Ukraine

  • That Jada emasculated Will in front of millions and that’s why you should never take back a cheating woman

  • That the slap was Will’s illuminati initiation

  • That Will is a violently dangerous man who could’ve killed Chris

  • That if Chris Rock had happened to be the late Betty White, she would have definitely died from the slap

  • That the slap was an act of Black on Black violence

  • That the lack of empathy white women have for Jada exposes their misogynoir

  • That more people in society should get slapped for being rude

  • That Will should be slapped for the really bad movie that was After Earth

  • That Will’s reaction is somehow a comparison to Trump inciting violence on a whole subset of people

  • That Will Smith and Trump are the same type of bad guy

  • That if Will Smith were white, he would’ve been dragged out of the Dolby Theatre in handcuffs, thrown in jail and cancelled for life

  • That being compared to G.I Jane is a compliment because she is gorgeous

  • That all comedians are now in danger from the Will Smiths of the world

  • What the slap revealed was that nobody in America is safe

  • That the real hot take is that everyone should’ve been wearing masks at the Oscars

  • That the whole thing was staged and it looked like Chris was prepared for the slap

  • That we’ve all been Will Smith at some point and we should be thankful for the Atonement of Jesus Christ that lets us overcome our stupidity!

  • That Will Smith shouldn’t have apologised first

  • That Will should be sued for 200 million dollars

  • That Will should be arrested

  • That Will should die!

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