The art of the skikini pic

Get your kit off and honour the Insta-age-old celeb tradition of scantily clad snow pics. Après-skin, anyone?

Your dressing gown has become a wardrobe staple, your hot water bottle is now a security blanket and you’re one argument about central heating away from moving out.

That’s right, kids. We citizens of the United Kingdom are freezing our collective tits off.

But what if we told you that freezing your tits off isn’t necessarily a bad thing? That, frostbite aside, it can actually be a very hot and glamorous thing to endure? No, we’re not talking about cryotherapy. (Standing in a giant freezer is inherently unchic. You’re not a chicken nugget, for God’s sake.) We’re talking about the much chicer celeb tradition of taking bikini pics in the snow.

Or, as we like to call it, the skikini pic.

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Behold, Kendall Jenner in a string bikini and Miu Miu’s delightfully furry moon boots from AW21, surrounded by snow in Aspen, Colorado. Keen-eyed Kenny followers will have noticed that she’s been flexing her snowboarding skills at the ski resort post-Christmas. But last week she briefly swapped the board (and salopettes and jacket and thermals) for, well, nothing at all.

Wim Hof said ice baths” read the caption that accompanied her skikini pic, a nonchalant nod to The Iceman who can sit in an ice bath for one hour, 52 minutes and 42 seconds. Brrr.

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But back to Kendall and, more importantly, the skikini pic, to which the model and tequila aficionado is no stranger. She pulled this trick back in December 2018, replacing the furry boots with a furry hat, while giving her followers a thoughtful weather forecast via the caption: fuck it’s cold”. Big sis Kourtney Kardashian immediately followed suit, flashing her peachy cheeks to Aspen’s snow-blanketed mountains in a bikini and a silver puffer jacket. Which, if we’re being honest, was a pointless addition to the fit.

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Now, don’t go thinking the skikini pic is a Kardashian invention. Origins of this phenome-gram can perhaps be traced back to the queen of all things extra, the Snow Queen herself, Mariah Carey. In 2013 she took her dog for a walk in Aspen while wearing a red bikini. Casual! The next year, in February 2014, Rihanna solidified the trend while wearing a white bikini paired with a leather jacket.

Since then, it’s become a staple photo op for glamorous people on ski holidays around this time of year, with everyone from Helena Christensen to Vanessa Hudgens hopping on the bandwagon and, well, taking the piste out of us no-snow norms.

Last year, Elizabeth Hurley didn’t even bother putting on a bikini top for her frosty pic, instead choosing to barely cover her breasts with a fur coat. How could I resist?” read the caption on her post, as though her 2.2 million followers would understand her apparently overwhelming urge to strip off in the snow. Still, though, she looked glam.

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A special mention also goes to Dua Lipa, whose December bikini pic was not taken in the snow, but in the Cotswolds, where it was also pretty chilly. Like Kendall, she paired her itsy bitsy white bikini with big fat moon boots, this time of the Hello Kitty variety. And while her red nose made it clear she was cold in the pic, Dua still looked hot.

All of which brings us onto a crucial question: why the hell do celebrities take skikini pics in the first place?

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The answer is pretty simple. Taking a bikini pic in the snow (or very cold climes) tells the world you’re so fit that even snow can’t cool your hotness. In fact, you might even be the one to melt the snow! Almost anyone can look alluring on a beach, but it takes a certain level of sexy chutzpah to tense your abs through shivers while your mate takes that perfect pic.

There’s skill in keeping the face seductive, too. Chattering teeth don’t exactly say come hither”, do they?

So if you really want to level up your Insta game this year, you know what to do. Strip off and embrace the great outdoors. Let the Arctic wind wrap around your body and watch those likes rack up, baby! Do it for the gram and the greater good. Then run a hot bath.

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