Not for rookies. Here’s an advanced guide to the outdoors.

You’ve decided to track the forest’s premier mythical beast: congratulations! Equip yourself well and become one with the shadows – you never know when you may need to disappear.

If you do get a Bigfoot visual, record it for posterity in case of a Blair Witch-style situation. Hopefully not, though!

Consult your knowledge of past sightings to verify his tracks. Was it Bigfoot, or was it just a guy in Timberlands and cosy winter drip?

Before you embark, contemplate the mountain and the physical feat it demands of you. It’s best if you play some rousing, movie soundtrack-style music off your phone at this point as well, just to really get you going.

Be prepared for adverse conditions. For example: standing horizontally against a cliff face.

When you reach the summit, bask in your achievement. Oh, and remember to capture the moment – because if you climbed a mountain and you didn’t flex about it online, did you even really climb the mountain?

Getting lost is practically a rite of passage in the great outdoors because this is where all the skills you’ve learned get to shine. Alternatively, you could just try hitching a ride – that works too.

In the (likely) event that nobody stops, a decision must be made: are you the friend who painstakingly reads the map or the friend who takes the opportunity to get a selfie against this perfect snowy backdrop? Both are valid.

Sure: you may end up walking around for hours, your feet half-frozen, only to discover that your tent was only five minutes in the other direction. But you’ll always have the memories!