Black Friday shoppers are scrapping over discounted TVs and All I Want For Christmas Is You has re-entered the charts. That’s right, the countdown to the countdown to Christmas is on, with just a few days left until you can have your advent calendar choccies for breakfast each morning.
They don’t call it the most wonderful time of the year for nothing, folks.
Along with the festive lights and cheesy tunes comes an epic drop of new TV shows and films to watch as you wrap those presents you’ve definitely already bought. From piping hot tea courtesy of LA’s most glamorous real estate agents to Gaga’s murderous turn as Patrizia Reggiani Gucci, this is what to watch this week.
Got time? Watch it all in one go
It’s back to sunny LA this week, where whitened teeth as bright as the sun and empty palatial mansions are in need of new owners. Luckily, the mega glam real estate agents at The Oppenheim Group are on hand to help out with that, flogging multimillion dollar properties in between catfights and relationship dramas. Now in its fourth series, the new drop of this Architectural Digest-meets-Real Housewives hybrid promises to deliver even juicer story lines, as new additions to the cast Vanessa Villela and Emma Herman shake up the group dynamic. What happened to Chrishell after her divorce? Find out now.
Available on Netflix now
The film worth leaving home to see
House of Gucci
Glamour, Gucci and Gaga. Need we say more? From director Ridley Scott (Alien, Blade Runner), this crime drama tells the story of Patrizia Reggiani (Lady Gaga), who married into the Gucci family and was hellbent on solidifying her place in the label’s dynasty. But in her quest for power she got a little… er, carried away. After her plan to turn the family against each other leads to the breakdown of her marriage, Reggiani decides to hire some help. No, not a couples therapist or divorce lawyer. A hitman. Also starring Adam Driver, Jared Leto and Al Pacino, this film’s not to be missed, if only to see Gaga’s impeccable costumes on the big screen.
Out in UK cinemas now
A documentary to feed the brain
Queens of Rap
Remember when Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion gifted us WAP in the middle of a global pandemic and, for those three minutes and seven seconds, everything felt good again? Well, so does Channel 4. So much so that it’s commissioned a whole documentary about it, charting how Cardi and Megan became two of the most successful women on the planet. The likes of rapper (and Stormzy’s cousin) Nadia Rose and presenter Zeze Mills are on hand to give their two cents, honing in on the evolution of women in hip-hop and rap over the years, from Salt ‘N’ Pepa’s Shoop to Megan’s Thot Shit. Tune in, hotties.
Available on All4 now
For feeling festive…
Full-fat Crimbo content to get you in the mood
‘Twas The Fight Before Christmas
If you’re not quite ready to watch Keira Knightly realise she’s “quite pretty” in Love, Actually, ease into the festivities by watching Apple TV+’s deadly serious documentary about a Christmas lights war in Idaho. Yes, you read that correctly. Following Jeremy Morris, a lawyer whose greatest joy in life is covering his house in fairy lights, ‘Twas The Fight Before Christmas focuses on the drama that ensued after the local Homeowners’ Association essentially banned him from decorating. That might sound like small-time true crime, but things escalate quickly. Expect to hear quotes like “My neighbours are essentially terrorists” and “I wanted to become the guy who saved Christmas”. And that’s just the trailer.
Available on Apple TV+ now
Talking points for when your next wave of social fatigue hits
Looking for something less docu-Christmas to get you in the festive mood? Look no further than Marvel’s Hawkeye series, which landed on Disney+ this week. Starring Jeremy Renner (The Bourne Legacy) as the titular bow-and-arrow bearing hero and Hailee Steinfeld (Pitch Perfect) as his new partner in stopping crime, the series takes us to New York in December, where the Rockefeller Center Christmas tree twinkles and Hawkeye is attempting to live a normal life. But not for long, of course. Bad guys don’t pause for Christmas. In fact, if there’s anything we’ve learnt from Home Alone, it’s that they get even more devious. Sorry, Hawkeye. Your fairytale of New York will have to wait.
Available on Disney+ now